leaves on the seine.

Saturday, December 18, 2004

i've been looking around for a blog template.
something more.. subdued.
orange is rather loud, and somehow i cannot relate to the fish anymore.
saturday's been rather, boring. i wasted it all away on three movies- new york minute, open water and bad boys. i bought 15 dvds for twenty bucks at bali.
dirt cheap.
i cn't wait for the match and dinner tmr, it's gonna be kick-ass fun meeting the guys again.
and everybody's coming back tmr, thank God.
jon, vish and char. whoosh.
im still rather sick, the food poisoning's still around. happens everytime i return from bali.

i've been thinking of recollecting this year.
month by month with aid from the archives, it would be fun. although there would still be many gaps in between. i wonder if i should even do it, events that i still remember happening crystal clear.

and this thing i feel inside has become a parasite, gnawing away inside.
i do not know what i'm doing.
im also frustrated by the fact that i can never write what i wna write here.
because.
anybody anywhere anytime can read it. and somehow your entries are always influenced by such elements. many a times, i've deleted whole entries simply cos i've deemed it too personal.. or perhaps i've feared it wldn't be well-received by somebody. you get what i mean.
there's no trng at all next week due to the Christmas break. bali was productive, i managed to go to the gym and do my running regularly so it's all good. it was a pity that i cldnt go down for the match against jjc. teo said i needn't as there was only abt 20mins left so yeah. but i heard the guys did well, beating them soundly. so that's good news all the same i guess.
Christmas weeks have always been so.. rushed and hectic. the only time of the year when i see town so packed. nvr liked it then. but im looking forward to it, i wna spend every single day out with my friends and all. mm.

Love at first sight is quite impossible isn't it. It's jst a load of bull. The instantaneous attraction that one feels when one sees the other for the first time is merely lust. How can it be love? It's jst a mere fantasy, stuff made out by hopeless romantics. Stuff from books, or movies. What are the chances of a mutual instantaneous attraction?
Why the hell are you even writing about this, you ask.
I'm trying to reason out the logic behind this whole thing. Cos I saw someone, and this someone makes me feel as if my whole future lies with her. Impossible, you say. Yes it is. I'm a skeptic, yes. Reality deals with you harshly at times and you learn. Therefore, it's a mere infatuation. Anyway this happened a few weeks before Bali and during my stay there, during the many hours spent by the pool i have concluded that it's mere infatuation. Duh.

Posted by zul at 2:36 AM